Banjo meets Harry Potter
by Steve HP
Summary: Banjo-Tooie: Harry Potter Style!
1. Banjo-Tooie with a Harry Potter Twist!

Banjo-Tooie  
Harry Potter Style!  
by: Steve HP  
Authors note: This is my first fic, so please forgive me if it's terrible!  
  
It was a dark and stormy night @ Banjo's House. Kazooie was playing Banjo-Tooie on Nintendo 64, Banjo was eating, and Tooty was insanely running around the house screaming, "I'm scared! I'm scared! Banjo, help me!" over and over. Kazooie lost to Targitzan again and said, "Tooty, will you PLEASE shut up?"  
"I'm scared! I'm... What did you say, Kazoo?" Tooty said.  
"For the last time, Tooty, my name's Kazooie! And I told you to shut up! You're ruining my game!" Kazooie said, accusing Tooty for being the reason of Kazooie's terrible hand-eye coordination.   
"But I'm afraid of the thunder!"  
"I don't care! I'll make you do the next adventure if ya don't Shut UP!"  
"Okay! Ok..." A faint popping sound was heard somewhere in the house.  
"Banjo, go check what that was!" said Kazooie threateningly.  
"*Munch, Munch* Hm? Bub I don wna!" Banjo said, with pork rinds in his mouth.  
"Ewww... Banjo! I told you not to talk with your mouth full!" Kazooie said, disgusted.  
"Frry. *Gulp* I mean, sorry, Kazooie. Okay, I'll go check." Banjo goes into the basement with a flashlight. "Hmmmm. I wonder what's down here?" Banjo starts to walk backwards. He then bumps into something! "Ahhhh!" Banjo heard two voice, his and someone else's. He sees a long stick with a light coming out of it. "Are you Harry Potter?"  
"Yes, I am," said the voice.  
"Hey! Kazooie read your books to me! You're very brave!"  
"What, you can't read?" said Harry Potter.  
"No. That's why I need Jamjars and Bottles to read signs to me."  
"You can't read? Why I..."  
"Hey! This is a PG Rated fic!" Said the voice of Steve HP.  
"Okay, we'll cool it down," Shouted Harry.  
"Well, anyway, I came here to..." but something happened. There was another pop and... Lord Voldemort appeared!  
"Ha! Ha! Ha! Harry, I've come to get you back! Oh! I see you've got a little friend with you! Well, I'll get you both! BWAHAHAHAHAH!"  
"Oh, no you don't," replied Harry.  
"Yeah! I'll call Kazooie! KAZOOIE!!!"  
"Banjo! What do you want?"  
"There's an evil wizard from the books that you read me over there!"  
"Yeah ri... B-B-Banjo! It's Voldemort!"  
"Told ya!"   
"Let's get him!" exclamed Harry. "CHARGE!"  
Harry yelled "Expelliarmus", Kazooie used Wing Whack, and Banjo... picked his nose! It was an all-out battle to get Voldemort. Finally, Voldemort yelled, "AVADA KEDAVRA!!!" All three fell to the floor and...  
  
"AHHHHHHH!" Banjo woke up from a scary dream of him getting killed by the most evil wizard of all time. Banjo looked around the room, and only saw Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire lying on his bed. "*Sigh of Relief* It was only a dream... I'm okay..." Banjo heard a faint pop and looked about the room "AHHHHHHHH!"   
  
  
The End  
Or Is it???  
  
So, how was my first fic? Not bad, eh? If I get enough responses, I'll make Chapter 2! 


	2. Banjo meets Harry Potter 2!

Finally, back by popular demand! It's...  
Banjo Meets Harry Potter Part 2!  
Note: There is a disgusting part (Boogers) in this story. Don't read if you have a weak stomach.  
It was a quite day in Spiral Mountain, UNTIL...  
Tooty started to play her flute! ^_^  
"Tooty, would you please stop making that infernal wracket?" Banjo said. Tooty and Kazooie stared at Banjo, confused.  
"Well, I heard it on Rocket Power," Banjo replied, talking about his favorite show.  
"Okay, I'll quit!" Tooty told Banjo, still a little confused.  
"Hey, how about starting a band?" inquired Kazooie.  
"But, but, but..."   
"Banjo, how many times have I told you not to use potty talk?" Kazooie said, threateningly.  
"No, I ment, I... can't really play my Banjo! It was just the sound effects guy playing the music in Banjo-Kazooie!" replied Banjo.  
"Well, okay, so that was kind of a stupid idea," Kazooie admitted.  
"Why don't we go outside?" requested Tooty.  
"Great idea!" said Kazooie and Banjo at the same time. Little did they know, there was something going on outside.  
  
"I don't know, after I had that dream with that Banjo person dying, this place just seems oddly familiar," said a famous voice.  
"Oh, Harry, please! This is not the location of your dream!" said Harry's friend, Hermione (Pronounced Her-mi-own-ee).  
"Yes, this is not the place!" said Harry's best friend, Ron.  
"Oh, I just feel.... Hey! What was that?!?!" Harry exclamed, seeing something rustling in the bushes.  
"I dunno," replied Ron.  
  
Meanwhile, on the other side of Spiral Mountain...  
"Wow! What a nice day!" exclamed Banjo.  
"Yes, I agree!" said Kazooie sarcasticly. Dark clouds spiraled around the mountain. It looked like rain. Suddenly, there were flashes of light on the other side of the mountain.  
"What was that?" inquired Banjo.  
"I don't know, let's check it out!" exclamed Kazooie. The three ran over to see what was going on.  
"Banjo?" Harry said along with...  
"Harry?" Banjo said.  
"Kazooie?" said Hermione.  
"Hermione?" said Kazooie.  
"Tooty?" said Ron.  
"Ron?" said Tooty.  
"George W. Bush?" said Al Gore.  
"Al Gore?" said George W. Bush.  
"Rocky?" said Bullwinkle.  
"Bullwinkle?" said Rocky.  
"THAT'S ENOUGH!" exclamed Banjo. Everyone stared at Banjo. "What?"  
"I'm outta here to do some White House buisiness," said GWB.  
"Yeah, I need to think of a new Presidential Campaign," said AG.  
"Come on, Bullwinkle!" commanded Rocky.  
"Coming, Rocky!" said Bullwinkle in responce.   
"Well, that was certainly strange," said a confused Harry.  
"Ahem, what about me," said an evil voice.  
"Ahhhh! Voldemort!," screached Banjo.  
"Yes, that's me! And I'm going to get you all! BWAHAHAHAHA!" threatened Voldemort.  
"Awwww, no! Let's fight!" exclamed Harry.  
"Yeah, I'm ready!" said Ron.  
"Let's attack!" said Kazooie.  
"Uh, I'll just..." Banjo picked his nose.  
"Okay, what spell should I use?" questioned Hermione.  
"Explelliarmus!" yelled Harry. Voldemort flew back 6 feet and fell on the ground.  
"Accio wand!" yelled Ron. Voldemort's wand flew toward Ron.  
"Gahhhh! Caught off my guard!" said Voldemort, angrily.  
(Here's the disgusting part)  
"Banjo! Stop picking your nose!" said Kazooie, disgusted.  
"Okay, almost done!" Kazooie stared at Banjo, close to barfing. Banjo took his finger out of his nose, and... there is a HUGE booger on it! Banjo flicks it at Voldemort and then...  
"Ahhhh! Okay, you've found my weakness! Ewwww... Snot! Ahhhhhh!" yelled Voldemort in pain.  
"Heh, my special attack!" said Banjo, proudly.  
"Oh, disgusting," said Kazooie.  
"Woah, I've never seen such a big snot ball!" said an amazed Ron.  
"Oh, I agree with Kazooie!" said a beyond disgusted Hermione.  
(That's the end of the disgusting part)  
"Well, I guess that's the end of Voldemort!" said Harry.  
"I'm not so sure, Harry, I just don't know," said Hermione.  
  
Meanwhile, in a far-off land...  
"So, they defeated my clone! They'll never get to me, HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"  
  
Well, that's the end of chapter 2! Expect Chapter 3 as soon as I get 5 more good responces!  



End file.
